My Vote for Worst Cover and Creepiest Book Ever

Obviously no gay men were employed in the making of this cover.

YES! That is an ATF officer (looking rather Nazi stormtrooper-esque) with the barrel of some automatic-looking weapon at Lady Justice's throat.

I present to you a book I WILL NOT be reading. According to Wikipedia:

Unintended Consequences is a novel by author John Ross, first published in 1996 by Accurate Press. The story chronicles the history of the gun culture, gun rights and gun control in the United States from the early 1900s through the late 1990s.

The story hinges upon the enactment and subsequent unintended consequences of several important pieces of U.S. gun control legislation and regulation: the National Firearms Act of 1934, the Gun Control Act of 1968, the Firearm Owners Protection Act of 1986, the Assault Weapons Importation Ban enacted by Presidential executive order in 1989 and the Federal Assault Weapons Ban of 1994.

Its thesis, as discussed in the Author's Note - A Warning and Disclaimer in the beginning of the book, pp. 9–10, is that enough bullying by what, rightly or wrongly, is widely perceived as a hostile outside occupation government will inevitably end in revolt if the area involved is large enough and has a separate enough culture and that this revolt will be undefeatable if the rebels use very-low-tech "leaderless resistance."

The novel's protagonist, Henry Bowman, shows an early proficiency with firearms, practicing whenever he can find the time. Encouraged by his father, he gathers an impressive firearms collection and gains extensive experience in piloting small aircraft. During college, Bowman is robbed, beaten, and sodomized by a rural gang. The incident nearly destroys him and causes him to become an alcoholic for a period.

While at a gun show in his hometown of St. Louis, Missouri, with friend Allen Kane, Bowman publicly embarrasses an agent of the Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF), Wilson Blair. One of Blair's men was trying to trick and entrap a fellow firearms dealer. Blair takes the offense personally, and with the support of the ATF's director, begins to plan revenge. Several years later, Blair and subordinate agents of the ATF plan to frame Henry and his friends as terrorists, smugglers, and counterfeiters. They plan to plant "evidence" when the men are away on vacation. Unbeknownst to Blair, Bowman delays his departure at the last minute due to a work commitment, and is on a friends' property when the agents arrive. Bowman assumes the men are burglars and engages in a gun battle with them, killing all but Blair before he discovers the truth.

Bowman realizes that his life has been irrevocably changed. He makes Blair record a video taped confession of his illegal actions, then kills Blair and disposes of all forensic evidence of the agents' presence. Afterwards, he hunts down and kills Blair's remaining subordinates. Bowman and his closest friends begin to systematically kill ATF agents around the nation, whom Bowman views as supporting the infringement of citizen's constitutional rights, and abusing government powers. Simultaneously Bowman releases the video tape of Blair to CNN, which claims that Blair and his companions have had a change of heart, realize what they are doing is wrong, and are now dedicated to killing other ATF agents. Amidst the national search for Blair and company, Bowman continues to rack up the body count.

Timothy McVeigh read the novel while awaiting his trial for the Oklahoma City bombing. He loved the book, and noted that if it had come out a few years earlier, he would have given serious consideration to using sniper attacks in a war of attrition against the government instead of bombing a federal building:

"If people say The Turner Diaries was my Bible, Unintended Consequences would be my New Testament. I think Unintended Consequences is a better book. It might have changed my whole plan of operation if I'd read that one first."

This is totally a proto-tea-party book. I found several Tea Party website/blogs that declare this a MUST READ. And to think I thought the Tea Party was afraid of that black feller in office but - HARK! - no, their real fear is obviously anal rape by a rural gang. This being the important event before the main action.

Yes, I know I'm being flippant but the fear of minorities, the fear of gays, it ultimately goes back to mysogyny, stereotypical gender roles, and ideals about what one should or, rather in this case, should not be allowed to put in your pooper.

Let's get back to the book, shall we? More specifically the blurbs on the back!

The Colorado Springs Gazette-Telegraph calls Unintended Consequences, "Magnificent...will terrify and appall jackbooted stormtroopers everywhere, and even more so the whimpering media geeks who squat to lick those boots."

Peter Kokalis, editor of Fighting Firearms, says, "This is the most disturbing book I have ever read. That said, it ranks only below HOLY SCRIPTURE as required reading." [My emphasis in caps.]

Aaron Zelman, executive director of Jews for the Preservation of Firearms Ownership [what?!?], says, "What Harriet Beecher Stowe die in 1853 [showing the horrors of slavery in Uncle Tom's Cabin] John Ross has done for today's struggle for individual freedom...Read it!"

Yes, the bracket reminder of exactly what Ms. Stowe did is necessary because I don't think most people reading this book would remember - if they ever knew at all. And get that, John Ross IS Harriet Beecher Stowe; next thing you'll tell me Glenn Beck is the modern day MLK...oh...wait. Shit.

"A modern novel of liberty to rival [that bitch] Rand's Atlas Shrugged," says Vin Suprynowicz of the Las Vegas Review-Journal. [The appositive is mine.]

And thankfully, it's already weeded from our collection. Though apparently someone bought it from our bookseller and has already given it back to the library, where I found it on the donation table today.

So, what have we learned, boys and girls? Timothy McVeigh is an actual founding father of the Tea Party (rather than all that bullshit about Sam Adams, George Washington, Ben Franklin, etc. etc.), as is probably John Ross since he did write McVeigh's "New Testament."

AND the Tea Party is up-in-arms (er, loaded with arms probably) not because of Barack Obama fear but because of anal rape fear! Or possibly both. Maybe they're afraid a gang of rural Barack Obama's will anally rape them! Gasp! The horrors.